A gift to you in honor of my
father.
My life has been full of minutes and minutes that
count.
Before I was born, my parents looked everywhere for
a child but were told that they were too old to adopt.
They came close to adopting a pair of twins and
were even ready to buy the little boys clothes when they were told
"Sorry, we can't let you have them. They have to
stay here in the orphanage because you're white and they're black."
They cried heartbroken, dried each other's eyes,
and started again with a new tactic.
They certainly had the means to raise a kid...heck,
daddy was CEO of Southland Corp. (7-11).
Finally they asked a priest they knew, who
ran orphanages all over the world, if they could adopt one
of his children from Mexico.
He said, "No."
But then I was born at 7:11am on Mother's Day, May
14th, in '77.
The priest looked at the time and date and called
mom to wish her Happy Mother's Day.
Like that I was whisked away from a life of poverty
on the streets of one of the poorest countries in the world into the
loving
arms of my two parents who could give me everything
I would ever want or need in the richest country in the world.
Think about that.
I could have been born at 7:10 or 7:12, it could
have been '78 or '76. It could have been the day before or after Mother's
Day.
Years, Days, minutes.
One minute.
One minute from poverty.
One minute from having ribbons in my hair as a little girl.
One minute from growing up with shoes.
One minute from being sent to one of the best schools in the USA.
One minute from any friendship cherished.
One minute from any lover I
have ever kissed.
One minute from all the experiences I have had in my life.
One minute from meeting the man I am going to marry.
One minute from the doctors who saved me from asthma.
One minute from the doctors who saved me from seizures.
One minute from the doctors who helped me with migraines that would last up
to 48 hours.
That's 3,360 minutes of throwing up and pain without being able to see the
sun.
With all my medical problems, I would not have
survived one minute in poverty.
I am 25 today. And I have the gift of this life
because I had a mother who gave me life.
Another mother who offered me a better
life.
And a father who never thought one minute about my
skin being brown and not white.
Today my father is 76, and will be 77 in November.
Three days ago, I heard my mom screaming in my
sleep.
My parents live several blocks away. There's no way
I could have heard her.
When I woke up, I saw that it was
7:11am.
Something was wrong. I called and found out that
Dad had fallen on my mom in a seizure.
We rushed him to the hospital.
Two days ago we found out that he has 7 tumors
in his brain.
He held my hand in the emergency room as tightly as
I had held his thumb as a child.
He said, "You know what this is like." Of course I
did.
But seeing the blood on his lips made me truly
realize what it had been like for him raising me all those years
before.
I squeezed his hand back, "Yes Daddy, I am so
sorry, but I guess you know what this is like.", I said peering down at
him.
We both laughed and cried
simultaneously.
Life is blood, tears, laughter and whatever wisdom
you can garner from the experience to make a difference.
We can choose to mold our lives, we can select with
care our reactions and thereby control where our spirit lands.
Dad did not cry. He chose to laugh.
He laughed to understand how he could be making
coffee one moment and be falling into his wife's arms the
next.
He laughed at how the realization of his mortality
made his wife's love for him and his love for her immortal.
He laughed with delight that so many concerned
people cared, and laughed that as a man he had never received so many
flowersbefore in his life!
When the doctor said, "This medication will slow
down your ability to think." He shrugged and said "That's life."
When the doctor said, "You can only
consume half a glass of wine a day at most." He made us laugh by looking
concerned as he replied,
"How long do I have to be on this
stuff?"
ahhh Priorities.
You see, he doesn't have to prove anything with his
mind. He doesn't need the hubristic ego, for he knows "That's life." And he
plans to enjoy it.
Dri nking in the moments, savoring each second of
time, that is his wine.
He used to tell me that worry is a waste of time.
And that concern is good up until you make a decision, then you should let it
go.
And he did.
At that moment he became free, like a butterfly in
a chrysalis becomes free.
When I was a little girl he used to take me for a
walk everyday down to Turtle Creek. I was struggling with my hearing loss,
and not being the same skin color as the other
kids. One day he showed me an acorn and I was in awe when he said the
tree used to be such a tiny thing. He said," As
children, we easily recognize that miracles are possible. As adults, we often
forget. You have made it this far. You are living
proof just like this tree is. But what you will do with this God-given gift is
up
to you. Will you continue at Hockaday, or will you
go to a school for the deaf? One way will be harder and you will risk
ridicule, but gain much more. One way will be
easier, but you will gain much less. Your mother and I had decided to let you
decide."
I immediately chose the harder path, and I did
struggle. But I did gain much more. For how would I have benefited in the long
run from an environment
that catered to my needs when the world is not like
that?
I think that is what happens before we enter this
world via homo sapiens sapiens bodies.
God says, what path do you want? Do you want the
easier path where you will gain less or the harder path where you will gain
more?
Mom says in her South Carolina accent,"God never
gives us more than we can handle, but sometimes I wish he didn't believe in me
so much!"
We are being prepared for something much greater
than where the most remarkable imagination could ever take us.
Dad worked hard to touch the sky, just like the
acorn does. His soul obviously signed up for an incredible task at hand. But
already miracles have
happened as a result:
Longtime friends who were just too busy to meet up
are making the time.
My parents have fallen in love again.
Our family has come together.
And many have rediscovered prayer.
What an incredible gift this soul has given
us!
So what can we give him in turn?
Keep the miracles alive! Don't get too busy again
when all this quiets down! The grocery shopping or business meeting can wait,
lives cannot!
Look at your partner and choose to fall in love
again, remember that that love is a priority in life!
Remember to talk to God or the Goddess, or whomever
and however you converse with The Divine!
Don't you get tired of the person
who only calls when they need something from you?
Don't you think The Divine gets tired of that too?
Miracles are there for us if we are ready to
embrace them! We won't receive what gets in the way of
our soul's tasks, but we will always receive
what our soul needs to create a miracle in that
moment. When I was little, I was a nerd who
read my dad's office papers.One day I came across a graph that showed the
minimum wage in cities around the world. 7-11 wanted to make a product. I asked
dad how much he wanted to spend per hour. He said $7.00 at most. I then
suggested he give the $7.00 wages to a city where .2 was the minimum wage. He
did. So you see, even those we perceive to be powerful may not always
recognize the power they have to create a miracle!
I'm not saying that it isn't hard. Believe me it is
hard to watch someone you love be in a situation you can't help.
But I can say that we can honor the gifts our
loved ones, like my father, give us by keeping those gifts alive in our
hearts.
Because when you are facing a hard road ahead, you
won't be regretting the item on your grocery list, and you won't be concerned
about the
big presentation you have to make tomorrow. You
will care less about how you will look at the luncheon, dance club or
Junior League meeting. You will be concerned instead about the people you love
and you will cherish the experiences you have had.
None of us is guaranteed a single moment. Life is a
biological suit made of mostly water that we as spirits have leased for a
very short while. And then there is no
guarantee on unforeseen damages.
The only guarantee you've got is love.
You had it before your life, during your life, and
will have it after you go.
Moments are precious. One single moment changed
both my dad's life and mine forever.
Here is my gift to you:
Think of these things whenever the clock
strikes 7:11. Or whenever you see a 7-11 on a corner.
Call the person whose been on your mind forever.
Cancel that meeting and take your wife to a romantic dinner.
Get over that stupid grudge. Take your child for a
walk. Perhaps you can tell them the acorn story.
You have so much power. Realize this. Embrace it,
and create a miracle!